Left to my own devices

Early last week, Kevin Drum wrote a blog post about debate. Specifically, Drum proffered the the view that most people aren't swayed by truths, or a logical laying-out of facts, but instead by feelings and sentiment. This resonated with me as 1) I agree with it, and 2) most folks agree with it, as well, but would deny that they do. Let's first look at a salient quote from Drum's piece: "Sadly, people are not persuaded by facts. They are persuaded by emotions. They are persuaded only when they're listening to someone who shares their worldview. They are persuaded by "arguments" that are beneficial to them - perhaps monetarily, perhaps in conferring status, perhaps in vilifying people they already didn't like. This is how you win in real life." I'm not sure it's always been this way. It feels like (there I go with feelings) people are more hardened in their beliefs now than they used to be, though that could just be a trick of memory. R...

I'd heard of the suicide, of course. Nearly everyone locally, who paid attention to the news, or was on social media, had heard of the death. I didn't know the man who died, though knew several people who did. Folks seemed in a state of shock. He'd had his demons, yes, but, as is so often the case, very few suspected that suicide would be the ultimate outcome of his mental and emotional travails. He was young, somewhere in his twenties, I think. Yet another life gone too soon. It was maybe a month or so later when I was contacted privately, online, via social media messenger, from the young man abroad. We'd never met and, honestly, I don't remember how we came to connect online. He was cute, certainly, and foreign. He'd spent some time in my town awhile back, then moved back home. We said the occasional 'Hello' to one another on social media, but that had been about the extent of our communication. Then one day, there was the message from him...

"We Miss You." Just those three little words from, of all places, the History Channel, really got to me. Apparently, long ago, I'd signed-up with them online, or purchased something from them, or who knows what? At any rate, it's been eons since I last visited their page (of that, I am sure), and so they sent an e-mail to me yesterday with those three words being the first part of the subject line. I'm a people person. It's a cliche, however, very true in my case. I tend to do better when in the company of good people whose presence I enjoy. Rightly or wrongly, my days can be made better or worse by those whom I converse with, what we discuss, how they react to me, and the vibe they're putting off. Whether it be a close friend distant friend, relative or loved one, I appreciate it when I hear from you, or, better yet, get to spend time with you.

There was a conversation once between my mother and I. The genesis of the discussion eludes me these days, but what sticks in my mind is a comparison mom made between her and my father and, subsequently, myself. We must have been talking about interpersonal relationships, because she remarked: "You know, Matt, people have nothing to prove to me when I meet them. I trust them from the get go, and then, if they do something later to show that I shouldn't trust them, then they have something to prove. But I think you're like your dad. With him, people always had to prove themselves to him first, before he would trust them. I'm just not like that."